20 days ago I walked into the hospital ready to be induced and meet my little boy. We had to be there at 2am and I was so nervous that I couldn’t sleep a wink before going to the hospital. I tried so hard to sleep, but how can you sleep when you know that you’ll be meeting your baby soon?
We checked into the hospital, signed lots of paperwork, got hooked up to an IV, and by 3am we were ready to go and the pitocin was flowing. Let me add real quick that throughout my pregnancy I was very close to developing preeclampsia. I never did thankfully, but at my doctor’s appointment on 10/31 my doctor decided that it was time to have the baby before things got worse. I was afraid that being induced could lead to a long labor but at the same time I was so ready to meet my baby so I agreed to the induction.
That first night wasn’t so bad. The contractions hurt but they weren’t unbearable. I didn’t get any rest though I tried. By 7am the next morning the doctor showed up to break my water. That seemed to help intensify the contractions and by 10am I was ready for my epidural.
I knew the epidural hurt but it was so much worse than I imagined it would be! I could actually feel the needle in my spine and at one point I felt like a rubber band snapped in my leg. It was the craziest feeling ever! I screamed but eventually the epidural was in and I was feeling a lot better.
I spent the whole day, November 1st, in labor. I made slow progress and that was the most frustrating thing. Each time the doctor checked me I was disappointed to find out that I was only 3cm dilated. Then 5, then 6. By that evening, I developed a fever. That’s when things got real uncomfortable for me. I was shaking uncontrollably! I was so cold and I was miserable. The started giving me antibiotics and Tylenol to fight the fever. At one point, they had to place a 2nd IV in my other arm and I had 5 different medicines flowing into me. Add heart beat monitors, catheter, and blood pressure monitors and I was hooked up to more things than I could count and it was awful.
Nothing went according to how I would have liked. You hear people talk about their epidural not completely working and that happened to me. I could feel my contractions in my tailbone and they hurt. It was still better than not having an epidural at all but it was all I could do to breath through the pain of the contractions and the uncontrollable shaking due to the fever. Multiple times they had to stop the pitocin so I could take other medicine or check on the baby. Apparently the baby wasn’t as active as they would have liked so I ended up on oxygen a few times, which I actually didn’t mind. The oxygen made me feel better.
By the second night all I could do was lay there and whine for Brian to take me home. I wish I could say that I was optimistic and stronger than I was but I wasn’t. I was in pain, exhausted, and starving. At this point all I wanted was to go home and go to bed. There is only so much that a person can take physically.
By 6am on November 2nd, I was 8 cm dilated and I felt like the end was in sight. I actually felt the baby flip over and move way down so I thought I was getting closer to time. But I was wrong again. At noon I was still only 8 cm dilated, feverish, and exhausted.
The nurse came in to check me a little before noon and I already knew what she was going to say. I wasn’t progressing anymore and baby Kai would need a c-section. I was actually relieved. After 34 hours of labor I was finally going to meet my little boy! I didn’t care that I was having a c-section, all I saw was an end in sight.
I was quickly prepped for surgery and taken to the operating room, still too tired and sore to be afraid. You always hear that you can’t feel anything during a c-section, only pressure. My experience was that either that isn’t true or I wasn’t completely numb because the c-section hurt. A lot. And that’s all I care to say about that.
At this point everything is pretty fuzzy because I was on so much pain medicine. I remember hearing his cry and the doctor holding him up so that I could see him. At this point Brian went over to see him and hold him. I was in so much pain and they kept offering me more medicine that would knock me out completely but I turned them down. 34 hours of labor and I was going to be awake to hold my baby no matter what! Finally, they set him on my chest and he calmed down and that was it. I finally had my baby. I was finally Kai’s mom.
He weighed in at 8 pounds 12 ounces and was 21 1/2 inches long. You could tell by his cone head that he was stuck and that a c-section was the only way he was going to come out. His official birth date and time is November 2nd at 12:25pm. He is perfect and I’m told that he looks just like me.
When we got to the recovery room, Kai immediately began to nurse. I cuddled him and he nursed until we left the recovery room. I laughed about this because he had a big appetite just like his dad!
Once we got to our mother and baby unit our parents came in and met Kai. I vaguely remember seeing them all hold him and pass him around but I was mostly sleeping at this point. His body temperature was a little lower than normal so he ended sleeping under a heat lamp for a while.
The rest of our hospital stay was as comfortable as can be expected. Doctor’s and nurses came and went constantly and we didn’t get any sleep. People visited. I learned how to feed him and take care of myself. Three days later we were on our way home with our baby Kai.
That was just over 2 weeks ago. Time is passing so quickly and so slowly all at once. Some nights Kai only gets up to nurse then goes right back to sleep and on those days I feel pretty good. Other nights he cries with a belly ache and I end up crying right along with him. The days are lonely while Brian works but the time with my baby is so worth it. I don’t have a routine yet. I don’t have a plan. And I don’t have a clue what I’m doing, but each time I see his little smile I choose to believe that I am doing the right thing.
There are so many more things that I could share but I think I’ll stop for now. Welcome to the world, Baby Kai. I’m so glad that you are mine.
Want to hear more about my journey to becoming a mom? Check out this post: Waiting for a Baby.