It’s Wednesday which means it’s time for another Celebrating Love Guest Post! Today, we have Kristin from kristenmarket.com sharing a fun way to organize your date nights so that you never miss one. I love this idea and I know you will too!
As I am starting off my career as a real estate agent and my fiance (of just over two weeks!), Vinny, is a full-time middle school teacher and a near full-time yoga instructor, time for a “real” date is difficult to come by. You may be in dating stages or married for years; unfortunately, we can all relate to having obligations that shift our time and money away from our significant relationships.
Today I am sharing how you and your partner can plan dates with less stress and more fun for the both of you!
It was so successful for Vinny and me that we decided it would be a lifelong habit for us.
Since dating involves you and your partner, make sure they are involved here. It only works because it’s a team effort!
Step 1: Talk about how you want to improve your dating life. You don’t need to fix everything at once, but you may figure out how to kill two birds with one stone.
Vinny and I focused on a few things:
Frequency: Every time we spent together became a “date.” Although there’s nothing wrong with that, we wanted to make sure we set some time apart to be special. We decided on monthly dates. Of course, we still have other dates, but making this plan is more about staying consistent and not forgetting about dating when life gets in the way.
Fun: When you call every time together a date it becomes less fun.
Planning and Paying: At first, Vinny would plan and pay for most of our dates. Even though I wanted to pay sometimes, it was difficult since I make significantly less and the things we did were usually not as affordable to me. Since I usually didn’t plan it didn’t help either.
So…Here’s the PLAN!
Step 2: talk about how often you want these official dates to happen and think of a better name than “official”. (Since we decided monthly we just call them our “Monthly date”.)
Step 3: decide what the rules are for hosting.
For us it was:
A. Always plan at least one activity new to both partners.
B. The host will plan and pay for everything. Sometimes it’s nice not to have to make a decision. Relax when it’s not your turn. The host can try something they really want to do OR use it to surprise the other partner by planning something more of interest to them. If you have kids, you take care of finding a sitter! Take care of everything! The paying situation has been flexible but it has given me the option to pay when I can.
C. The host would (as much as possible) keep the activities of the date a surprise. If you decide to keep elements of the date a surprise, ALWAYS let your partner know the time and date of your date well before it happens. Also, tell them the type of attire would be appropriate.
Step 4: Who will host first? Switching off on planning dates will make both you and your partner’s life so much easier. If you do monthly dates it ends up being 6 per year. You can do it!
Tips for a successful date:
Remember that this is about making memories and having a good time. Don’t focus too much on extravagance or worry about outdoing any previous dates.
Tips on finding activities:
Use this as an opportunity to talk about things you have always wanted to try (or things you are willing to try if your partner is really into it!). Play “Never Have I Ever”.
Keep a running list of restaurants, activities, and recipes. Yelp places you frequent and save names of similar places. Be a tourist in your town and ask others for ideas.
Just for fun, find a way to keep your memories. We tried to keep a journal specifically for our special dates. It wasn’t consistent but still nice to look at. I hope you and your partner have found ideas here to make dating more consistent and more fun! May your year be full of love and fun dates!
Kristen Mark is a real estate agent in Southern California. When she’s not browsing for her dream home on Zillow, there’s a 90% chance she is painting and watching Netflix. Visit her website kristenmarket.com